Not as in work (seeing as Sley really could use a JOB), but I'm talking about Old Testament Job here...
Before you "x" me out, give me a chance, I promise I won't be preaching and this won't be boring...this is more of a self-realization.
So I wrote a post asking ya'll to pray for Sley and I as we embark on this trial of us depending on God for just about everything now (but isn't that the way it is supposed to be?)...
Mom and Dad gave me a new NRSV bible for Christmas...it's black leather bound with silver edged pages and very thin (as opposed to the big fat bibles)...everything I asked for. I had told myself that once I got this new bible I was going to start to put it to good use. It has been way too long for this religion major to not have an open line of communication with my Maker so I figured once I got my new bible, I would start...Dont get me wrong...I pray, all day it seems like...but how do I hear God's voice if I'm not reading His Word?
The bible sat in the middle of the living room floor with all the other Christmas presents until last night. For the past few days, Job has been put upon my heart. I couldn't remember specifics from the book of Job that I had learned from the past except for the fact the man just couldn't catch a break!
So last night when I got home from work after dinner, I picked up that bible in the middle of the floor (partly feeling ashamed that I had not done it before now) and decided to read Job. The more I read, the more my chest hurt and my spirit stirred. I prayed and prayed that God would speak to me through Job's sufferings and his pleads.
I opened my bible and read more of Job before bed, still asking God..."Lord, I know you are big enough for my pleas...You said Job was a good man and yet he lost his health, wealth, and children...I praise You in this storm and thank You for bring me closer to You..."
I in no way am comparing myself to Job. I know I sin, daily...I am not worthy to have all the blessings I pray for and I am no one to be asking for God's favor. I humbly come to my Father and ask Him for forgiveness and pray that His presence be with me at all times.
So often when bad things happen, I am guilty for wondering what God was punishing me for...Karma comes to mind...but really I don't think that is what happens...God doesn't allow bad things to happen to us just because we sin. God breaks us but is the only One that can truly heal us. God used all that happened to Job to get Job to repent. I am no better than anyone and because of this, God doesnt keep bad things from happening to me. I have strayed and I believe God is using this season to bring me back to Him.
Please continue to pray for us. Pray that God will be glorified through all of this. He is faithful...He brought me out of an awful marriage and made me into a stronger person because of it...God is really blessing us already though all of this and the peace I feel is truly unbelievable!