I'm often reminded of my first day in World Religions at Barton back in 2005. My professor walks in and simply says, "Bad things always happen to good people."
I feel that I owe somewhat of an explanation of 1-my last blog post a while ago and 2-why I've been absent. I'm not going to go into any details and this is probably the last time any of this will be mentioned. Brandon and I separated November 3rd. I am not going to say everything was all his fault but he made some bad choices throughout our marriage that led us to where we are now. I know now that a marriage cannot survive without trust and I had lost that trust with a choice he made about 2 years ago and was never able to get it back.
It's hard. I've never been through this before. There is no handbook and no ones situation is the exact same so I'm living day by day, relying on God to point me to where I need to go. My family has been amazing and my friends have been my rock. I've rekindled my relationship with God and I owe it to Him how well I'm actually doing.
I'm happy. Everyone at work can tell a huge difference in my attitude. I'm carefree. My best friend told me that she was so happy to have "me" back. My whole identity was "wife" so now that I'm "Andrea" again, I'm learning who "Andrea" really is again.
One of my other friends is going through somewhat the same ordeal as I am. She always reminds me, "God is good. Something good is going to come from this!" I believe her.
I wont lie. It does get lonely. I don't miss the anxiety and stress I had before when I was married but I do miss having someone.
The best decision I made after everything happened was to take a break from facebook. I needed time to focus on me and needed to hear God's voice without any distractions.
I want to thank those of you that have texted me/facebook messaged me since everything happened. You don't know how much I appreciate your care and it really lifted my spirits. The first few weeks of November I was in a dark place but I'm happy to say that I can finally see the light and have found true joy from God.
So who knows where this new journey will take me?! But I'm ready to continue with the blogging and would appreciate any and all prayers you can send my way.
Here's to a New Chapter!